Had a bit of a broken day today

34 weeks and 2 days. 

I thought this morning that I was going to have a wonderful day but my lovely pregnancy hormones got the better of me. 

It's always the smallest of things that set you over the edge isn't it? 

I got up bright and early this morning and had my usual breakfast of yummy coco pops. And obviously I'm blaming the baby for my coco pops cravings..... And felt really positive about all my jobs I had to get done. 

Our poor lovely Tigger needed to go to his vet appointment this morning cos he had a poorly eye which was making him very sorry for himself so I jumped (as much as a heavily pregnant woman can) into the shower. 

First progress barrier: no shampoo!!!!! Surprisingly, this got me quite upset and panicky. I dived out the shower, dripping wet long and thick hair, and delved into my back up box. No back up bottle!!!!! Now what? I got back into the shower in tears trying to figure out what to do. I couldn't not wash my hair so I ended up using shower gel and lashings of thick conditioner to try and rescue my hair. My hair goes brittle within seconds if I don't use the right thing on it. So, mega disaster narrowly averted. 

Then after getting myself barely ready, I got myself and my dog, Jimmy ready. I had heard somewhere in the past that it is best not to put a cat in a travel box until the last second as it is quite distressing for them. 

Little did I know that it would be more distressing for myself than poor Tigger! 

Second progress barrier: He wouldn't go in and he was sticking his legs out and pretty much screaming at me. 

I let go of him and just started crying!!!!

I called my other half and cried down the phone to him. I wasn't sure what he would have done, but I called him anyway. 

He suggested I call the vets to at least let them know I was going to be running late. 

I called the vets and asked if they had a sure fire way of doing this process stress free and they did, and it was magic!!!! 

She suggested I tip the crate on it's end so the open door was facing upwards, then grab Tigger by the scruff of his neck and lower him gently but firmly, back feet first, into the crate. 

It was incredible. He went straight in and off I went to the vets. 

My poor Tigger has got conjunctivitis! 

After this all happening before lunch I was so exhausted. I just wanted to stay in and chill out after that. I just managed to do some housework but I have also done a few minor bits in the nursery too. It has made me feel so much better about 'being ready' for Jessica. 

I've got just 11 days left until I'm being induced. 

Next panic: my hospital bags!!!!!!!!! 

Second Trimester Niggles

I don't really know why everyone says that the second trimester is 'plain sailing'? 

In comparison to the first trimester sickness and the third trimester indigestion and heartburn I can kind of see why it is the lesser of all three evils BUT I kid you not when I say the second trimester brings with it it's own trials and tribulations! 

I am no longer throwing up multiple times a day but I am suffering with relatively severe SPD, chronic daily headaches, exhaustion and a new one for this week again......crying!!!!!!!! 

I feel like a bag of nerves! 

I come into work to 'discover' my chair has left me for for a slimmer owner, and my cool and collected reaction was to slam my bag on my desk and hurl my coat under my desk. Then I turn round, grab the spare behind me and crack on with my day feeling very aware of my mild over reaction. 

I have felt so confused at work that I am second guessing myself and when proof reading and checking work I am making sure that I'm not being over zealous or too flippant. 

The stress of the simplest of things like adding a new printer is just beyond me and has me flying out of the office in an over emotional blubbering state. 

I don't know what's happened to me! I was so calm, blissfully happy and relaxed and now I am tearful, scared to say or do the wrong thing, or even stick up for myself! I want me back from 2 weeks ago. I can't deal with people as a general thing, I have a short list of my lovelies that have a mutual understanding of my sensitivities and know exactly how to cheer me up or keep me on at least a level playing field, and for those I am eternal grateful for. 

The best thing about the second trimester is when you start to feel your precious bundle wriggling and squirming around inside you! For first pregnancies that is unfortunately a few weeks after consecutive pregnancies BUT every wriggle, every kick, every delicious tumble is what reminds me that I am an incredibly strong person! 

I have done all this before, and please don't tell me it will all be worth it in the end, that's what they said last time and I never got to bring my Penelope home, never got to change her bum, feed her, dress her in the prettiest dresses. But I have waited and fallen again and been blessed with my ray of sunshine from my beautiful angel as a Christmas gift! And I am doing all of this all over again! I have to feel the gentle kicks of my second daughter knowing she will never meet her big sister! 

This is my pregnancy and I will be putting myself and my little girl first, over and above everything else in life. 

My rules. My Princess. ❤️